


Feather Pillow 2

by khorybannefin



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Childhood Trauma, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Trauma, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:15:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25058326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khorybannefin/pseuds/khorybannefin
Summary: The traumatized reader speaks up for the first time.
Relationships: Castiel (Supernatural) & You, Castiel (Supernatural)/You
Kudos: 32





	Feather Pillow 2

Feather Pillow (Part 2)

Pairing: Reader + Castiel

Author: khorybannefin

Author Gender: Female

Reader Gender: Female

Summary: Continuation of fluff involving a traumatized reader and her new attachment to Castiel, the only person who really makes her feel safe.

Warnings: Description of past trauma of reader. Lot of fluff.

A/N: This was requested. I did it before another thing in my list and I apologize to that person. I’m going to have to do research for that one. But this one was all kinds of cute. Darned Castiel fluff will be the death of me. Fanfic diabetes.

You were dreaming again. Dreaming of the cage.

You were twelve when you ran away from home. You didn’t even remember why, but it couldn’t have been for anything important. Certainly not bad enough to make up for what happened to you afterwards. You’d spent weeks under the overpasses with other kids, most of them older than you. Some of them had tried to force you into sex with them, but you threw such a fit they decided you weren’t worth the trouble. You didn’t eat well. You didn’t sleep well. It was really cold at night and you hadn’t ever been alone in your entire life.

When the lady had offered to let you stay with her you were skeptical, but she was so nice and you were so lost. You took her up on it. The house looked great from outside. She opened the floor and light and warmth came out of it. You were so relieved. She let you shower, gave you actual clean pajamas. She showed you to a room. You slept harder than you’d ever slept. That’s why waking up in the middle of the night was so scary. Hands were on you, they had grabbed you out of bed and were carrying you downstairs and through long halls. You landed in a cage, straw on the floor and a bucket in the corner, like you were an animal.

And that’s exactly what you were.

The nice lady came to you, laughing as you pleased to be let loose. She grabbed the hand you reached out to her, holding it in an iron grip as fangs unfolded. The bite was savage and she sucked and lapped at your blood as you struggled, screaming. She let you fall back as you cradled your arm against your body. It wasn’t the first time, or the last.

There were a lot of cages. People came and went, all ages. Some they ate. Others they turned. You didn’t know why they kept you so long without doing either. It seemed the woman had a soft spot for you, though you couldn’t tell by her behavior. She abused you as much as the rest of them. There were never less than four but sometimes as many as ten vampires near. You couldn’t escape, and the less you drew attention to yourself the better. You stopped talking pretty quickly. Eventually you just became a quiet pet. They could do anything to you. You didn’t fight, didn’t scream, didn’t beg. They broke you.

When vampires started running and screaming, grabbing weapons you were barely interested. Two men came through the cellar, beheading vampires as they went until there was nothing but headless bodies. They started opening the cages. When they got to yours your clambered into the back corner, holding onto the bars.

“Come on, sweetheart,” the big one with sad eyes held out a hand and spoke to you soothingly, with kindness that you hadn’t heard in years. You shook your head at him, not trusting. He tried to come into the cage with you and you kicked the bucket at him. The other one laughed.

“Looks like she doesn’t trust you Sammy.” The taller one glared.

“She’s traumatized Dean. Do you blame her?” He sat, no longer crouching, not moving. Just talking to you, telling you it was ok, that they were all gone, and that you could go home. That hurt. You didn’t remember home, didn’t know where it was. Your eyes filled with tears and you shook your head again.

“No? You can’t go home?”

You nodded in answer to his question, lost and miserable. They’d taken her home from her. She’d been here. She understood how things worked here. Was it good? No. But she knew it, knew how to deal with it. Now all of that was gone and she had nowhere else to go. The one called Dean came back, seeing you still in the corner, crying now.

“Good grief Sam, really? You’re making little girls cry now?”

“She doesn’t have a home to go to Dean. I don’t even know how long she’s been here. She won’t talk.”

“Well we can’t just leave her here. We’ll take her back to the bunker until we can figure it out.” Sam turned to you.

“We have to go, honey. Our house is safe. It’s like a bomb shelter. No monsters and a lot of protection. Here, look,” Sam pulled a knife and held it out to you, handle first. “You can have this, for protection. I promise we won’t hurt you.”

You’re not sure why you believed him, but you snatched the knife and threw yourself into his arms. Sam literally carried you from the building, tucking you into the back of a big black car. You sat with your face against the glass the whole ride home. You hadn’t been outside, hadn’t seen the light, or the world, in years. You knew it was years, but you didn’t know how many. You didn’t even remember your birthdate, though your memory had flashes of cakes and balloons. The boys assumed, and rightly so, that you’d pretty muched blocked out your memories of your llife before. It was the only way to deal with the hell you were in.

When you got to the bunker, as they called it, they gave you a room. It was too big. You yanked all the blankets and things off the bed and built a cocoon in the corner, between the endtable and the wall. The nightmares started immediately. You’d wake, three or four times a night, screaming, and end up clinging to one or the other of the Winchesters. It got to where they wouldn’t leave you alone, one of them always with you. They let you nest, amused when you ran all over the bunker stealing blankets and rugs, piling things in corners, building your own safe shelters. They showed you Netflix and you were hooked. After that you rarely slept in your room.

Slowly you learned that you needed contact. You’d get agitated and unable to explain why, but being close to one or the other of the boys helped calm you down. Sam liked to cuddle. Dean was more uncomfortable with it, but a look from you and he’d lift his arm for you too as you tucked yourself against him. Then they left you with Castiel.

He was perfect! He understood you, even without talking. He remembered your name for you. And he was SAFE. Just being near him made everything so much better. He would hold you on his lap, let you sleep on him even. You could get as close as you wanted and he didn’t mind. In fact, he almost seemed like it made him happy to have you turn to him for comfort and safety. Sam and Dean told you he was an angel. You didn’t believe them, but it was a nice idea. He felt like you imagined an angel would, soft and warm and protective. Sometimes when you were almost asleep you could have sworn that you felt feathers against your skin. It just made you cuddle in deeper.

****

It had been weeks and they couldn’t get you away from Cas. They needed him for jobs and you clung to him, fighting them when they tried to separate you. Cas didn’t seem to want to leave either.

“Dean, she is hurt. She needs someone to watch over her. I’m an angel. This is what I’m supposed to do, take care of people.”

“Cas, damn it, there’s too many damned demons for Sam and I to go in alone. Charley is going to come sit with her.”

You’d never met whoever that was and you shook your head fiercely, wrapping your arms around Castiel tight. Dean was getting really exasperated.

“Come on, Y/N. You’re a big girl. Cas has work to do.” Dean tried to detach you from the angel by force. You screamed in his face.

“NO!”

Everyone stopped and it got really quiet. It was the first thing you’d said. Your voice wasn’t hoarse, though you felt like it should have been. But you needed to be very clear, and it was too easy for everyone to ignore you when you were quiet. They were all looking at you, even Cas. You stared into those blue eyes, begging him to stay.

“Y/N?” Sam was very quiet. “Do you really need Cas to stay? Tell me.” You nodded emphatically, but you knew what he wanted.

“Cas stays.” Sam broke into the sunniest smile you’d ever seen, and he hugged you gently, which you liked very much, but you still wouldn’t let go of Castiel so he ended up sort of hugging you both. He stood up and looked at his brother.

“Dean, we can do this. We’ve got some favors we can call in. Let her have him if it makes her feel better. Cas is right. Angels are supposed to take care of people who need them.” Dean made a disgusted noise and threw up his hands.

“Fine,” he said, then shook his finger in your direction. “But don’t think you’re getting away with anything, Miss. I expect to hear an explanation when we get home.” You stuck your tongue out at him, which made him laugh and ruffle your hair. Sam was on his phone as the brothers left, already calling in those favors.

“You spoke.” Castiel was looking down at you. You looked up at him. You were feeling so many emotions that you struggled to latch onto just one. But only one thing made it out of your mouth.

“For you. I talk for you. I love you.”

You buried your face against him, afraid of what he might say, what he might think. You knew you were an adult. You just didn’t know what that meant yet. The only thing you were sure of in your whole life was the man in your arms. You loved him so much you thought you’d explode. You needed him with you, all the time. He made you feel whole again, like a real person and not a dog in a cage. He kept the monsters away, kept the nightmares away. He wass everything good and right in the world and you couldn’t live without him. His arms tightened convulsively around you. You knew he understood everything, like he always did. He pulled back a little and made you look up. He kissed you on the forehead, his blue eyes deep and shining.

“I love you too, Y/N. I won’t leave you.” He kissed you softly on both cheeks, and then very lightly on your mouth, surprising you. “Come on. I believe there’s a new show about that dragon you like on the Netflix.”

You couldn’t resist the grin that crept across your face, You hugged him and you both went into the TV room, curling around each other on the couch to watch the new “How To Train Your Dragon” show.


End file.
